This Little Piggy

I've been browsing Craigslist and Uncle Henry's (Maine's localized Craigslist) at least a few times a week. I should know better, since this is how I ended up with an extra dog and a donkey that I didn't really need but of course had to have, but where's the fun in that?

Today I just about died when I came across this ad:

Text of ad: "We have 4 Juliana micro-pigs about 5 weeks old that will be ready to go in a few weeks. 2 males and 2 females. We do not have papers, but the parents are on the premises. The price is low because we don't have papers and they have not been fixed. We would be pleased to talk with you about placing our little piggies."

BB Acres has a lot of animal structures. Besides the barn and the run-in, there is a large chicken house and a separate A-frame shelter with a fenced-in area. So of course I've been daydreaming about what I'll put in those places. When I saw the Craigslist ad for micro pigs, it seemed like a perfect fit! Despite the fact that I really have no need for more animals.

I immediately emailed my family and chatted online with one sister about how tempting this was and that my animal hoarding days might truly have begun. (This sister asked if I was experiencing any cold drafts or flickering lights in the house, in case I was being possessed by the previous owner/animal hoarder.)

I mean, who can say no to this??

I turned to Google for help. At first it seemed that micro-pigs would be a great idea! They would only cost pennies a day to feed! You can keep them indoor or outdoor! They're super friendly and trainable! You can walk them on a leash! Paris Hilton has one!

And then I started reading articles about how miniature pigs might really be more like the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow - they don't truly exist. From the little I can glean from reputable sources (as reputable as anyone on the internet can be), it appears that there is no true micro/mini/teacup/Juliana breed.

There have been many quests over the years to breed pocket-sized pigs. Currently, micro pigs are just bred from generations of potbelly runts, and there is no real guarantee of their size. All those adorable pictures are of piglets only a few days or weeks old. In fact, the internet is full of stories about people who paid hundreds and sometimes even thousands of dollars for a micro pig and ended up with a big ol' porker.

The owner of the Craigslist ad described the micro-pig world as being like the Wild West: "Not a lot of rules & regulations about what constitutes a micro-pig."

Even Paris' pig grew up:

Before

After

But maybe these were the real McCoy! I asked the owner what size the parents are. The first answer was promising: Harriette, the sow, clocks in at 16" high, 24" long, and only 25 pounds. The boar, Oscar, is slightly bigger at 17" high, 25" long, and 35 pounds. That's not too bad, right??

Except that pigs can start breeding way before they're done growing. Harriette and Oscar are maybe 10 months old and haven't hit their true size yet.

Not only is there absolutely no guarantee of what size the piglet will be, it is also incredibly hard to find a vet who treats pigs-as-pets.  Harriette and Oscar's owner had to call around the state before finding one vet who could spay/neuter the piggies, and by that time, Harriette was already pregnant. So who knows how much that would cost?

Long story short, I'm afraid that micro-pigs will not be the next residents of Blonde Bomber Acres. Cue the familial sigh of relief.

Any opinions on what should be the next critter(s) to grace BB Acres ?