Drumroll, Please

It's my mom's birthday! She was so supportive the day of my accident. In focusing entirely on the insurance debacle, the very real support of my parents was left out. Plus, this post wouldn't exist without my dad, who offered up his truck (and treasures) without hesitating. So, lest you think that I am an ungrateful daughter, I hereby officially thank my parents for being the most awesome parents ever. Not only did you get me through that day and the days following, but you also let me have the gem that is the subject of today's blog post.

This is what we've all been waiting for. Without further ado, please allow me to introduce Lord Bearnesin-Noble, affectionately known as Nobby to his chums.


Nobby is terribly embarrassed about the unfinished walls behind him.



Nobby is a gentleman and a scholar, hailing from the aristrocratic Alaskan society and until very recently, a resident of Pine River, Wisconsin.



He first resided in the kitchen, but felt that staring pensively
out the living room window was more appropriate.



Some of you may be thinking to yourselves, Did Kelsey hit her head when she flipped her car? Why would she bring a bear home?? The answer is yes, I did hit my head, but I've always been this weird. Sorry, it's a permanent affliction.

Speaking of weird, as I've been driving the F-Bomb I've noticed that when I go over big bumps it feels like the tires leave the road and the whole thing shifts over. Especially on that godawful Road-Which-Shall-Not-Be-Named. I'm sure that it's just related to shocks or suspension or whathaveyou and it's not how I imagine it, but this is what comes to mind every time it happens:

Anywho, welcome to BB Acres, Nobby! I haven't decided yet if he should get his own entry on the "Furred Residents" page or if that is a step over the line into truly-crazy-lady territory.

PS - SPEAKING OF WEIRD: Did you know that bears and raccoons have penis bones? I sure didn't until my dad asked if I wanted to take Nobby's baculum with me. I did not. (To be fair, my dad is not a total weirdo...it came up after I observed that Nobby's family jewels were painstakingly preserved in the taxidermy process. And apparently the baculums [baculi??] are kept as hunters' trophies; there's no better way to display your manliness than by wearing boner bones as jewelry.)

PPS - Upon doing baculum research, I learned that a 4.5 foot long walrus penis bone fossil sold for $8,000 in 2007. The penis bone, belonging to a walrus species that went extinct 12,000 years ago, apparently still has "weathered skin and dry muscle tissue" on it. It's simutaneously horrifying, disgusting, and fascinating. What a great conversation piece: Oh, that art hanging over the fireplace? It's the largest known mammal penis fossil.